My Jaw Aches

Stress Test

My teeth have been bothering me for the past couple of days. It has happened to me before and will happen to me again. When I get stressed out, I clench my jaw when I sleep. Is there a solution to this problem? Maybe, maybe I shouldn't get stressed. Easier said than done. Work right now is stressing me out. I took a lead person position which I didn't really want to take because I like my manager. I feel bad for her because it's hard for her to get valuable employees. Is it the atmosphere, is it the staff? No, I think it's the people who apply. Very undependable people. They want to work when they want to work. Never mind if my manager is there from sunup to sundown. They will not help out, they run out the door after their shift is over. No way, I'm not staying, find someone else. Well right now that someone else is me.

Always Learning

I'm learning things I don't want to learn. They always say do not stop learning. I'd love to learn things I enjoy. Numbers is not one of those things. Numbers are word salad in my mind. Some people are good with numbers, some are good with words. Some are good with both. Me, not so much with numbers. I hate numbers. I cannot do math in my head and thank God the till tells me what go give people back otherwise I'd be sunk.

Numbers Suck

‍

Entering numbers into a computer and taking a tally of my till at the end of the night is not my idea of a good time. It's ok when everything figures out the correct way. But if it doesn't, I'm at a loss as what to do. This happened last night at work. Counting my till I put a hundred-dollar bill where the fifty should have been. It threw off my entire balance. My manager was sitting with me, and she instantly knew what I did. Me, not so much. I'm like what just happened here. There is a list of things to do at the end of the night at work and none of them are good. Opening up the safe is even a pain in the ass if not done correctly you have to wait ten minutes before you can try again. Co-workers get a little angry over that. They want to go home and cannot go until you have completely all duties. There has to be two people on at night. It is a policy we adhere by. makes sense if you see the calaber of people that visit said place. Enough said about that. I don't like to judge but at times I wonder how they get through life. It must be a challenge.

It Makes No Sense

Kudos to those who understand and love math. Ugh I despise it. Numbers do not make sense in my head in the best of times. Put me on a limited time schedule (we have to do done and out of the store by 10:30 pm). We start all duties with the safe and tills and ten. Being under a time crunch just makes me stress out more. I tend to try and hurry and that is when mistakes occur. My manager told me this last night. I already know this, but she told me I was also learning. Not so sure if this is something I want to learn. If someone could turn those numbers into words, it would be greatly appreciated.

I've already informed my manager if this is something I like I would continue on. If it turns into something I hate I'd let her know. So far, I'm leaning toward the hate column. Let's all think of the pros and cons. One pro is I received a raise for doing this. One con is right now, I hate doing it. That's a big con. You are never too old to learn. This is true. But I think we all like to learn what we are interested in. Math and numbers are not high on my list of things I'm interested in. Matter of fact they are at the bottom of my list. Like I said earlier, turn those numbers into words and I'd be thrilled.

Make It Stop

‍

Does this mean my teeth will constantly be hurting and I won't be able to take a deep breath for a while. Last night I was so wound up I couldn't get to sleep. I was up early, and my jaw ached. Good morning to me. Right now, my eyes feel grainy, and I could take a nap. Is this job worth all this? The job isn't no. My friendship with my manager is. She is a normal person who doesn't want to work from sunup to sundown. She wants a normal crew of people she can depend on to come into work when they are scheduled. She has me right now and that's about it. I'm not going to get into other staff and their issues. It isn't my story to tell.

I'll take some Tylenol and call it a day. Try and get some sleep tonight and tomorrow night. I will not wait for a text asking me to come into work. Every time my phone pings with an incoming text I cringe. I really shouldn't be living like this at my age.

I can tell myself don't sweat the small stuff. Lifes too short. Quit if you don't love it. All those things mean something. In reality, I cannot leave her shorthanded. I would feel guilty and not able to live with my conscience.

So, time for me to step up to the plate.

Jaw or no jaw.

‍