Dementia In the Family

Why?

My mother passed away from dementia. She has seven siblings and a total of four have passed away from the same disease. Recently at a sit down with some of my siblings we spoke of this. My sister Tammy and brother Brian were around my mother before she passed. Tammy (the goofy, beautiful one in the photo above. Her chin on my sister Sherri's head) was a primary caregiver. Having earned her wings a long time ago my sister did indeed pave her way to heaven. The things she has told me she witnessed from our mother are mind blowing and horrific. She and Brian were swapping stories, along with my sister Sherri who apparently witnessed some of the mayhem that occurred on a daily basis with our mother. They say that Dementia patients can become physical and abusive, and mother was no exception. How Tammy endured taking care of her is beyond me. I’ve told her plenty of times I could not have done it. I’m not exaggerating, I could not have. Feedings, change of clothing, bathroom duties. Tammy is an angel here on earth. She patiently took care of our mother when she was at her worst. Many of the stories I heard that day boggled my mind. 

It Isn't Good

Dementia is not a disease anyone wants. To forget your children, your spouse, to wander aimlessly with no direction. Dementia is not kind. Not to the mind nor to the body. Often people with dementia have increased weight gain, they no longer care (or function well enough) about their appearance. Loss of memory and judgment are a large part of having dementia. They say treatment may help but there is no cure for this disease. Dementia is caused by damage or changes to the brain. While we all hope and pray this disease does not afflict us, there are those among us who aren’t so lucky. I often wonder if a person can tell their memory is slipping. Do they notice the signs of dementia? As we age, we all forget. There is a difference between forgetfulness and having dementia.

Cognitive Decline

Dementia is a slow cognitive decline, the inability to perform everyday tasks. All of us are guilty of forgetfulness at times. But if it happens on a daily basis and continues to worsen maybe someone should take notice. If our confusion increases and we cannot remember events that took place a day or so before perhaps that is a sign that things are not looking good. Personality changes and changes in our behavior is another red flag people should pay attention to.

60 Really

Turning 60 isn’t just a life altering experience in some ways it brings on the start of dementia. I know I didn’t feel my age until reaching the age of 60. 60 bothered me, no longer young, considered elderly, none of it sets well. How we live our lives can increase the risk of getting dementia. Stay socially active, do not isolate yourself. People 65 and older are at greater risk. There is nothing we can change about that. Our age is what it is. High blood pressure and high blood sugar are also two higher risks for dementia. Being overweight can cause a higher risk along with smoking and drinking. Get out and run for God's sake or take a walk. Being inactive adds to the risk. So, get up off the couch and go outside and start a daily exercise routine. Start with a walk around the block. Maybe sooner rather than later that walk will turn into a run.

Is It Hereditary

Exercise soothes the soul and is so good for you in every way. So, you see, there are ways to help yourself out. It is unknown if this is a hereditary disease or not. The last I’ve read is there is no proof of that as of yet. I’ll go with that. I’m praying it is not in my genes. 

Go Away Dementia

Listening to my sister Tammy’s war stories with our mother was enough for me to know I want nothing to do with this disease. It scares the crap out of me. It is something I think about on almost a daily basis because of my mother's family.  

It's Happening Again

I’ve heard through the grapevine another one of my mother's sisters is slowly slipping into the nightmare that is her own mind. There is no escape, trapped and uncertain with a foggy memory and unstable brain. A descent into madness is on the horizon.

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God help us all.

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